Effectively Communicating With Those We Love

Hi all! It's been a while, and I wanted to start this next blog with a bang. Communicating with those we love can be joyous as well as frustrating. Some things to think about when we are trying to communicate something that makes us feel more vulnerable:

• What are we wanting to convey to this person?

• What do we want to get out of this conversation?

• How can I discuss this topic from a place of care rather than retaliation?

• How can we reach a place of understanding (even if that place is agreeing to disagree)?

These are just some of the questions that can help us have productive conversations. Some things to think about when being on the receiving end of a hard conversation:

• What is this person trying to tell me?

• Is this person coming from a place of love or retaliation?

Many times, those that we care about are coming from a place of hurt and vulnerability when they bring up the harder conversations. They are probably trying to come from a place of love; however, the delivery might not make it seem that way. Giving those you love some compassion, and the benefit of the doubt will generally help the conversations to go better than expected. This does not mean that every conversation will be easy and fix everything immediately, but it can make it so both people feel heard and understood. If you feel that the person is attempting to retaliate, ask clarifying questions so that you can better understand where they are coming from. We are not going to communicate perfectly every time; however, trying to work on effectively communicate with those we love creates deeper connection.

We all come from different backgrounds and experiences, so we look at how our loved ones communicate through those lenses. Our perception dictates how we hear what our loved ones are saying. Remember that your perception of what is said does not mean that that was your loved one's intent. Utilizing clarifying questions while communicating and not making assumptions allows your perceptions to change, at least for that person. Communication is vital to a relationship. Communication creates trust while lack of communication breaks trust.

*(This blog topic does not include abusive relationships)